Like a lazy SEO specialist writing for a lunatic's web page, the usual keywords were repeated devoid of context: Satan, bleach, & socialism were mentioned often.
"Remember September 12th, 2001? When the nation gave us a blank check?" said CEO Wilbur X. McKraken. “What a wonderful time! I bought a third yacht tha…
"Sure, I blasted through that red light. But your safety is your responsibility, not mine." The unconscious victim had no response. “See?” the driver s…
Tyler's mom called into the basement. “Your little sister is crying! Can’t you let her play with you and your friends? She said something about a beaut…
Joseph Stalin giggled. “OMG guys, I love Republicans! They’re SO GOOD at killing! There’s a plague raging and they tell the proletariat to avoid doing …
“Egads! Who is regulating the militias? Without organization, any pub-sop loonabout could brandish a musket and cause mayhem in the town square!”
“Damn,” commentator Fred Shabiro gasped. “Just a few steps and I’m winded,” he said, before issuing his criticism of a woman who can launch herself int…
“Our CEO makes 28,000 dollars per hour. That’s 4,000 times my pay. Tell him to get his ass down here and prove he's worth it. Then maybe we won't strik…
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